Viewers were shocked as they watched a video that TMZ, an entertainment news outlet, had obtained of Ray Rice, former NFL player for the Baltimore Ravens, abusing his then-fiancee in an elevator. Major news outlets only highlighted the video, but Twitter conveyed the real story.

Days after the tape was leaked to the Internet, Janay Palmer, Rice’s wife and victim of the assault, released a statement on Instagram criticizing the media for ruining her husband’s life. In light of the video, Rice was cut from the Ravens and suspended from the NFL indefinitely, ridiculed on social media, and became the face of abuse in popular American culture.

In her statement, Palmer also informed the public that she and Rice would “continue to grow and show the world what real love is.”

In response to Palmer’s statement, female Twitter users created the Twitter hashtags #whyIstay and #whyIleft, explaining why they chose to stay or leave their abusive relationships.

For one student at HHS, this hit home particularly hard. She was in a relationship she ****believed would become more abusive unless she left. She wanted to remain anonymous for this story but she said that “the worst part [of the relationship] was seeing him be physical with other people. Watching him do something hurtful to other people really upset me and scared me a lot.”

She is not the only person to experience abuse in a relationship. According to DoSomething.org, two in ten girls between the ages 13 to 18 have been sexually or physically abused by their partner.

In the case of Anonymous #1, her partner started the abuse by pushing her around and eventually became more physically abusive as they spent more time with each other.

“I didn’t miss [the relationship] once I left. Once I saw the red flags, I was able to get out of it fast before anything else started to happen,” she said.

Ms. Liz Richard, the Executive Director of the Minn. Coalition for Battered Woman has worked with many women that have been in abusive relationships.

“When we talk about domestic violence, [we say] it’s a whole system of strategies or tactics if you’re in a relationship where one person maintains power or control,” said Ms. Richard.

Richard thinks that many abusive relationships continue because the victim in the relationship believes that the amount of abuse is normal in a relationship.

In a recent survey conducted by Stop The Violence, a non-profit organization dedicated to ending dating violence, 12 percent of teens ranging from ages 13 to 18 reported they did not recognize the abuse once it started.

“I’ve worked with those with a history of violence in a relationship, a pattern, where they have stayed together and have worked it out. It takes a lot of work and a lot of will to stop using violence. It’s not the norm, but it certainly can happen,” Richard said.

Richard also added that not all relationships are bad. Cassidy Dinkins, junior, has been in one with her boyfriend for seven months.

“I think trust and honesty are the two main parts of a good relationship. If you don’t have trust in that person, then you shouldn’t be in a relationship. You have to be honest to give them a reason to trust you,” Dinkins said.

Dinkins feels that staying out of abusive relationships and being in healthy relationships is the best way to stay safe.

“If someone ever abused me, I would leave right away, because they would repeat [their actions] over and over,” Dinkins said.

Another senior at HHS, who will also remain anonymous, admitted to abusing his own girlfriend while they were in a relationship.

“We started out fine. Then we started arguing and fighting all the time and I was getting mad. The moment I took that first swing I knew I had messed up. I shouldn’t have done it, but she had made me so upset that I didn’t know what to do,” he said.

Anonymous #2 believes that girls in abusive relationships only have one real option.

“Just get out [of the relationship]. It’s as simple as that,” he said.

According to Richard, people who think they may be in an abusive relationship should check for creepy or cute behaviors. Creepy behaviors could include obsessive phone calls or texts, while cute behaviors could include the need for constant interaction in between classes. Richard said some of these signs are an indication of someone having control over everywhere you go.

For the student who was abused, staying out of an abusive relationship is the best thing that you can do for yourself.

“Everyone has a boundary, everybody has a limit. My question to those girls who are staying [in abusive relationships] is, what’s yours? What hit will you decide will be your last? Because in the end, it’s not your partner hurting you but you hurting yourself,” Anonymous #1 said.