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It’s never the boyfriend

Sep 11, 2018

In the era we find ourselves living in, word travels fast. So fast when an event occurs in the news, within hours, even minutes of its occurance, a slew of news articles are already on the scene reporting it.

So when the media broke and let the news spill of Mac Miller’s death, a river of reports, stories, theories and comments were already being made.

The 26-year-old’s death is tragic and has been one of the leading headlines on the news since it happened on Sept. 7, but one of the most eye-catching aspects to all of the reports filed and written about Miller, is the hateful comments that have landed on Ariana Grande.

Grande, was a long-term girlfriend to the rapper before announcing their split in early 2018, after nearly two years of dating, was the victim to countless hateful and cruel tweets, Instagram comments and fan backlash.

What could they possibly be blaming her for? One might think. Online trolls created a trend of leaving comments such as ¨You killed him,¨ and ¨You’re the reason Mac Miller is dead,¨ on her various accounts.

Actions like these commenters have expressed has created a culture among social media, celebrity culture, and even in our ordinary lives to blame none other than girlfriend.

Sayings like ¨You dodged a bullet,¨ or ¨Good thing you got out when you did¨ are often used light heartedly, but they come with a stigma of making the girlfriend of the relationships the root of all of the problems. It is never the boyfriend.

Internet cowards are accusing Grande for the death of her ex-boyfriend, Miller, but let’s think about this.

Demi Lovato, 26-year-old singer, overdosed in early August this summer and it was also a huge headline on the news for weeks.

These reports also included that her ex-boyfriend, Wilmer Valderrama has staying by her side through her recovery process and rehabilitation treatments, after ODing on Oxycodone, resulting in an emergency administration of the drug Narcan.

Due to the support Valderrama has given to Lovato during her recovery, the media had seemly placed a halo upon his head for being an aid and a lifeline to her, during such a crucial time.

When thought about, they are relatively similar stories. A celebrity couple dated in the Hollywood spotlight, for a substantial amount of time. Both couples broke up. One of them ODed. The only difference so far is that Miller is deceased and Lovato had survived and is currently in rehab.

These truly are not very different stories, yet when the ex-boyfriend had ODed, the girlfriend was seen as the monster, who killed him.

Is it sexist? Is it ignorant? Either way, the stigma has gone too far.

It was never Grande’s job to save Miller. Women do not have to be men¨s caretakers. Social media is using her as an escape goat, to dance around the real problem. The problem is addiction.

I don’t think anyone ever said that it was Valderrama¨s job to saved Lovato. Valderrama and Grande have both expressed their loved and admiration for their then-partners.

In the end we have to focus on what is important and the facts. Miller, Lovato, and everyone that has been lost in Hollywood and the world due to drugs, has been loved. No one tried to kill them. None of these people who ODed, chose to OD. Instead of point fingers at others and blaming other people, places or things for our very real problems, we need to focus on the undeniable cause: Addiction culture in the world we live in today.

Addiction is an epidemic and it is rising before our eyes.

Addiction Hotline: 1-877-992-5266

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